Nothing better than an Argentine insult and by an Argentine. It’s that Argentines can be recognized around the world for many reasons: mate, of course; athletes, such as Diego Maradona, Leo Messi or Luciana Aymar; artists, such as Nathy Peluso or Natalia Oreiro, who, although not Argentine, must be admitted that she is a bit Argentine; but there is one in particular that surpasses all of them. Whether it’s because of their creativity, originality, and even their passion at the time of doing it, it is possible that there is no person in the world who insults better than the Argentines.
Insult is something present in all parts of the world. However, Argentines have an incredible ability to take both an everyday situation and something completely surreal and turn it into a monumental insult. From eschatological phrases, to referring to the entire genealogical tree of the person, and even taking someone’s last phrase and saying it again, with another tone, and voila: insult.
Here are some of them. “Some” because, don’t forget, an Argentine can turn everything into an insult with the right tone.
Argentines can turn any phrase into an insult by adding the word “shit” to it. The most common is usually to send someone to hell, the typical “fuck off”, which is practically an everyday phrase, but it can also be applied to absolutely any situation and you just have to add “shit” or a “shit on”. For example:
- “Andate a la mierda” / “Fuck off”
- “Sos una mierda” / “You’re a shit” ;
- “Hijo de un camión lleno de mierda” / “Son of a truck full of shit” ;
- “Gil de mierda” / “Gil of shit” ;
- “Me cago en vos” / “I shit on you”
“Dirty, bearded, disheveled”
Everything related to grooming and personal appearance is a tray served to generate a cataract of insults.
- “Sucios, barbudos, despeinados” / “Dirty, bearded, disheveled”
- “Andá a lavarte el orto” / “Go wash your ortho”, many different shapes
- “Tobogán de piojos” / “Lice slide”
- “Cabeza de rodilla” / “Knee head”
- “Tarzán de macetas” / “Potted Tarzan”
- “Inspector de baldosas” / “Tile Inspector”
- “Leñador de bonsái” / “Bonsai Woodcutter”
- “Helipuerto de mocas” / “Heliport of flies”
- “Sucio” / “Dirty”, blunt and dry
Even animals are not saved
In the Argentine catalog there are a series of insults that can be made by naming any animal.
- “Sangre de pato” / “Duck blood”, for when passion is lacking;
- “La concha de la lora” / “The parrot pussy”, nothing represents anger like this phrase;
- “La concha del tero” / The shell of the uterus”, a variant of the previous one;
- “La concha del mono” / The shell of the monkey”, change the animal but keep the feeling
- “La concha de Dios” / The shell of god”, unmatched
Even something as rich and delicious as the traditional alfajor can become an insult accompanied by the indicated phrase:
- “Cara de alfajor” / “Alfajor face”
- “Cara de galleta” / “Cookie face”
- “Asesino de croquetas” / “Killer of croquettes”;
- “Cementerio de choripanes” / “Cemetery of choripanes”
Among the Argentine insults there are some that are already part of the daily conversation, to the point that in some contexts they do not even classify as an “insult” properly speaking, as is the case of “boludo”. Among the most used in the day to day are also:
- “Boludo”, it hardly counts as an insult anymore
- “Pelotudo” / “Asshole”, which is a little more forceful
- “La puta madre” / “The fucking mother”
- “La concha de tu hermana” / “Your sister’s shell”
The last two are among the most used but also debated in recent times.
The most creative
This creative facility that Argentines have when making insults is what makes them take more than one person off guard, this is because for someone else that phrase would not be an insult or it would not even occur to them. For example:
- “Arruinador de alegrías” / “Ruiner of joys”
- “Cortocircuito hablante” / “Short-circuit speaking”
- “Que te garúe finito” / “That finite garue you”
- “Inservible como cenicero de moto” / “Useless as a motorcycle ashtray”
- “Bocina de avión” / “Airplane horn”
- “Boludo esférico” / “Spherical bullshit “, a bullshit wherever you look at it.
Those are just some of the Argentine insults because there are always more, many many more. And if you wanted to know more about how Argentines speak, don’t forget to check the 25 Argentine phrases that summarize an Argentine.
I don’t know who translated this, but dear sweet innocent person, “concha” in Argentina does not mean “shell”. It is a colloquialism for the female sexual organ.
Some really poor translations here, boludo isn’t bullshit, boludo is someone with big balls, implying all their blood rushes to their balls and not their brain, therefore they’re an idiot. Pelotudo means the same, but that one is only an insult whereas boludo you can use as a term of endearment.
Some typos as well, ‘útero’, ‘moscas’…
Overall a pretty cool article, but more so for Natives so that anyone learning Spanish doesn’t get confused. ‘Cenicero de moto’ made me chuckle, didn’t know that one.